Sunday, September 28, 2014

New Face!

It's just a quickie and a selfie this week.  I am feeling a little overwhelmed with all there is to do and places to be so my usual blogging time is not a viable option.
I have a new face! Well, ok that's a little mix of hyperbole and distraction but it's my term for getting new glasses. They do,  after all, adorn my face during most of my waking moments and even several sleeping ones if I'm tired (or inebriated) enough. So, to me, it's a big thing.
I am still yet to give Maurice a proper introduction but for now a phone selfie will suffice. The lenses have this new fangled coating on them to block overly strong blue spectrums of light which are especially reflected from fluorescent lighting and electronic devices. I'm sure my eyes, which do spend countless hours staring at the computer screen, will thank me. The camera, however will chastise me greatly while I try to avoid reflections as evidenced below.
Another day, another challenge. Bring it!!!


Sunday, September 14, 2014

Pointy-toed Boots

My Nana was an amazing woman.  I always admired her strength, and general kickass attitude.  When we were naughty, she would threaten to kick us in the butt with her "pointy-toed boots".  I never saw said boots, but there were rumours...

At her funeral in 2011, I sat stoically through it all.  I had to for Dad as I knew my strength was the very thin line keeping him upright.  Walking out of the funeral home though, it all just hit me that she was gone.  This woman I so admired for her strength, wit and bright streak of deviousness was human afterall, and had succumbed as we all do.  My head fell, my face cracked and that single tear rolled down my cheek.  A single tear was all it was.  Me being me, and the clumsiest woman in just about all the world, tripped when my brother stopped in front of me and down I went.  I was wearing heels (of course) and my ankle went on that rather horrible angle it tends to do when your heel stays upright while the rest of you doesn't and I was left to brush myself off and hobble out of the funeral home, red faced, swollen ankle and feeling silly.  My only thought was, "Thanks Nana, I needed that.".  I'd finally got the kick up the butt she threatened all those years, at just the right time because Barlow girls are bred tough.  We fight hard, and we take the blows in stride.  I didn't walk right for about a month after that.  A lingering reminder that I had it in me to blaze my own path and make of life what I wanted.  It was to be the start of something big.

I like to think I have some Viking blood in me somewhere.  I've been called a shieldmaiden and I rather like that visual too (sexy breastplate and all lol!).  Sometimes though.... sometimes those pointy-toed boots just don't want to fit.

I have my moments, like we all do.  Sometimes those moments turn into days, and even a week or more.  Believe it or not, I battle self-consciousness on a daily basis.  I, too, feel inadequate, incapable, unworthy, unattractive and alone.  Sometimes the demons surround me, and my sword isn't quite weapon enough to slay them all.  It's the pointy-toed boots, you see.  They are the secret weapon.

Life is sink or swim baby! 

There are times when you feel consumed by all those fears.  All that baggage you've built up wants you to open it up, just for a peek.   My worst is the disappearing act.  There's things that have happened in my past (and we all have a past, there's no need to elaborate) which mean I have a 'thing' about people, especially those I respect and admire, going quiet.  Not just the usual to and fro that life brings, but people I connect with on a daily basis, suddenly not connecting.  Whether they want to, or not, is of course irrelevant to the baggage.  Watch those pointy-toed boots come flying off and going missing in the closet.  It's a very quick path to bringing my fighting spirit to a cowering, insecure halt while I scurry and hide under a rock for fear of looking stupid.

But that viking spirit is hard to kill.  It's in my blood, afterall.  I can only indulge the woe-is-me for so long before I decide that, stupid as I may look or feel, I have to get back to the fight.  I don my pointy-toed boots, and being well rested as I was under that rock, those demons better watch out!

xx








Monday, September 8, 2014

Fate and the Arrival of Maurice

Well goodness it has been a while.  After a very slow start to the year, my (much more straight-edged) regular photography and design work kicked into high gear and I have been busying myself with shoots and editing enough to have very little chance to stop and catch my breath.  The fact that I've barely left town, let alone the state or the country this year, says it all really!!

But it's good.

I've always had the attitude that life will throw things at you, and if you just open yourself to the possibilities, then you'll see the way forward clearly with time.  Of course, patience is the absolute least of my virtues.  I've always worked hard for what I have, and I'm happy to when there's something I want.  Those closest to me know just how hard I'm willing to push, and how far I'm willing to go when my heart and mind are set on something.  There are some things, though, that you just can't make happen, and sometimes they're better if not pushed.

Sometimes, fate just takes a hand.

Ohhhh but that drive in me to get things done, to push on through the difficulties and just make it happen is so strong, and so inate.  Lately though, I've been in awe of what can just happen, completely out of the blue.  I'm utterly amazed at just how wonderful those things can be.  I have had some things happen in my life which are just downright awesome, simply because at the right time they just came along.

One of my clients for my regular work had their camera, which we use to photograph their stock, break unexpectedly.  It just so happened that they'd just gotten their hands on an upgraded but very similar camera and had been playing with it when the disaster happened.  Thankfully, we were able to quite easily and quickly switch to this new camera and I found that it had a few features that, while they weren't useful in what I was doing for this client, they would be very useful indeed for my Scarlet Harlotte shoots.  I happened to have the same camera as these guys previously had, so the seed was planted to upgrade.

Shortly after that happened, I did a little shoot for a dear friend of mine for a birthday party.  Driving to the shoot, I pulled my camera out of my mobile office bag in a slightly too heavy-handed manner, and managed to break off a fairly substantial chunk of the plastic surrounding the lens.  It still worked well enough to do the shoot and a few other bits and pieces, but it's since been a bit flaky on the focusing and really won't stand up to much more punishment.  I really didn't want to get just any old lens though.  This one had a zoom that was a lot more than most which come standard with new cameras and I really didn't want to downgrade just for a new one.

Enter, Maurice.

I'd made myself a little email alert from the ads on Gumtree (for the Americans amongst you, it's kinda like Craigslist), and really didn't expect anything from it.  So much so, that I generally just deleted the emails without reading them (since I had an idea of how much it would cost, and that I couldn't afford it).  One day, whilst doing half a dozen other things (as I am wont to do), my peripheral vision picked up the model number of the camera I wanted in my emails.  I checked, and not only was it that camera, but it came with the very lens I was after, and stupidly, incredibly cheap!!!  The timing couldn't have been better, and it all worked out swimmingly.  So now, I await the arrival of my new camera, Maurice.

There's been a few things like that.  Quite a few, in fact.  Let's face it Scarlet Harlotte wouldn't exist without the swift hand of fate intervening in a rather fantastic and unusual way.  Even the business itself has led me to avenues, and people that I still can't quite believe I've come across.  It's amazing the curveballs life throws at us, when we least expect them.  It's completely, unfathomably, wonderfully, ridiculously beautiful, when it connects with the bat, just right.

Yep, this post is totally about my camera and my business.  No double meanings here.  Move on people.... nothing more to read into...

xx